Feb 5, 20211 min

Dureyshevar: From shame to celebration

Updated: Apr 9, 2021

My menopause experience mimicked my menstruations. No muss no fuss, they came and went and barely made any noise. During menstruation I never kept track of my cycles, would go to the bathroom, discover blood, then run around trying to organize pads. Clearly this was not common, I remember the intense pain and discomfort my sister went through every month.

I did notice little things as my cycle started to change, a very stubborn metabolism that refused to play along, a decrease in my raging libido, waking up at night and feeling warm, a little extra blood, not all the time, sometimes and oddly silence amongst my peers.

I wondered at times if I was the only woman in my group going through this, because nobody talked. The other thing I noticed was the shame, I was not sure where the shame was coming from, or why, but boy it was there.

I made some of my friends talk by asking questions. Some I did not even bother with, but I wondered why there was no community around this very important life change. Why was I was going through it alone.

In some cultures the onset of periods is marked by lavish celebrations, I always found these embarrassing, especially for the women going through them. But as I come out on the other side of this period I feel free like I have never before and this calls for a celebration. I feel we should create rituals of, and celebrations for, the end of our cycles.